Sunday, July 12, 2009

Checking In, finally

I haven't written in a while. I took a break from reflection in order to be more functional.
 
Clean laundry/ 1 1/2 cups of flour/ 100 uses for vinegar and some for baking soda/ washing the same glasses/   trips to Ralph's.... milk, eggs, bread, Advil/ ed-join twice a day (job search)/ E & J & board games to turn the set off/ dinner at five-- occasionally anyways/ bedtime stories

I already knew how to be a recluse but being a mindless recluse is harsh. 
I ordered three books to read last week-- on teaching, to prepare for the possibility of employment. The first one arrived three days ago and I devoured it. I had purposely starved my mind.  It's amazing that I can put two sentences together. Most detrimentally, I stopped my daily bible devotions for a season. I even stopped taking pictures. My sons' picture albums will skip a year.
Ignorance took over.
If I stop thinking will I stop hurting? 
no.
I could have told you that before putting myself through the agony. 
Idleness wether in action or mind is aging me faster than time.

It's my birthday today--  happens once a year.
Like Lucy said in a Peanuts episode, "Stop the world! I want to get off!."

I began reading through the bible during my pregnancy with A, I plan to pick up where I left off.
Cheer for me. Or, if you are a co-believer, pray for me.
:o)

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