It's my freshman year in college and I'm sleepy all the time. I keep asking myself, why is the sun so bright? as I squint all the way to my Humanities class. Back at the dorm, I fall asleep after reading three more pages of Homer's Odyssey.
I finally decide to go to the campus clinic, where, they draw blood and then prick my finger... I feel so lightheaded and my blood pressure is so low they keep me there for a while.
Turns out I have iron deficiency anemia.
Ta-da, and like that I became my mother (I'll explain this later).
No big deal, I begin taking iron pills until... I'm so backed up that I stop taking them... off and on, on and off...
Fast forward time until about 10 years later... my third pregnancy. I get the usual blood work done except this time it's at a community clinic because I'm not employed/insured. Somehow my first labs are misplaced and I have to get them done a second time, this time I'm about three months pregnant. You'd think they'd tell me I was iron deficient after drawing blood from me twice. Nope. Not until my 8th month when I was seen by my Ob's partner, when he asked if I was taking iron. So I started taking iron again. I never took my iron deficiency too seriously. Low iron to me just meant being more tired than usual. I took iron supplements and would discontinue them once I felt better, replacing them with a multivitamin, which I figured contained iron.
The last time I had a bout of low iron was about one year ago. I didn't get my blood drawn, I recognized the fatigue and my inability to stay awake past 8 pm. I didn't want to pay for a doctor's visit to be told what I already knew and to be prescribed iron tablets that I could purchase over-the-counter. I self-prescribed myself iron and fortified my nutrition with Herbalife shakes and multivitamins. I urgently needed the energy to study for, and pass, my CSET exam to obtain my preliminary teaching credential. I began eating iron-rich foods, fortified cereal, studied..., passed the exam.
About six weeks ago, I experienced an abrupt change in energy level and overall well-being. I had so many odd symptoms that I thought for sure there was something severely wrong with me, not iron deficiency.
First, my hands bruised easily twice in a week. Closing my car door, and then carrying a 5 gallon water bottle. There was no real trauma to cause the bruising in either case. At the same time, my hair began to fall out, in chunks, while showering. Followed by the headache that would not leave, accompanied by difficulty concentrating or remembering. Then, after guest teaching for a three hour assignment, I had a very difficult time standing after leaning down to pick up trash off the floor. It was as if I did not have enough energy in my legs to lift my own weight. My legs seemed limp and powerless. When I came home, I had the same experience walking up, and especially down, the stairs. It definitely took more work. After a day of having to exert much energy in my legs to accomplish regular tasks, my legs were very sore and remained sore and weak.
The most disconcerting symptom was my absent short term memory. Everyone has, at some point, experienced going to a room to get something and then realizing once you've arrived, that you've forgotten what you came to get. Exactly like that, except constantly, and each time. I felt I couldn't carry-on a conversation, I even doubted my ability to cook a meal that required too many steps. I could see myself adding salt and forgetting I added salt one-minute later. I found myself not able to stick to a task. I felt disoriented, in a fog.
I made a desperate call to the community clinic, now just down the street from where I live. I made an appointment and got blood work done. The next day, October 6th, I get a phone call. I needed to go back soon as possible to discuss my lab work. My Ferritin Serum (iron store) level is 2 ng/mL. Umm that level should not even be single digit, much less 2. I knew it was bad, when I've been anemic before I've had a ferritin level between 7 and 10-- I had always been told it should be more than 12 for females. The practitioner tells me I probably need injections but they are costly and I don't have insurance. I'm thinking.. so... how sick do I need to get before I am hospitalized and need a blood transfusion? I am completely unable to function and have since taken nearly all the month of October off work. I am prescribed... surprise!... iron tablets 3x per day.
If I take the tablets three times a day for three months, I may be able to raise my ferritin score by ... two points. With 8 more points to go, I can just be a vegetable in the meantime. um, no.
My mom and husband, who see me fading into a shadow of myself, took matters into their own hands and have since purchased injectable iron in Tijuana. They've given me 4 intra-muscular injections so far. (Is it legal to bring needles across the border? We weren't sure, but did.)
Today I have just enough stamina to write this. Please, do not expect it to be my most insightful entry. I just want to write about my ailment so I don't feel the need to whine to my poor family who's probably tired of me being tired.
I'm also writing because today, on Oceanside's first true cold day of fall, I have a new debilitating symptom to add to my list of 'woe is me.'
My hands, and especially my fingers hurt, badly with the cold. I've never had this before.
It's like this, from what I understand, Iron carries oxygen through your blood. Without enough oxygen your muscles fatigue earlier (they need oxygen to work) and your memory won't work (also does not get enough oxygen), and circulation is affected. I have low blood pressure. Now my fingers hurt when it's cold? it does seem related.
So how have I become my mom?
My mom has always struggled with iron deficiency. Growing up, I remember my mom taking naps almost daily and we knew not to wake her. I was often late to school and my mom would often forget to pick us up. I perceived that she would forget things easily and I witnessed her pass out a couple times. She'd pull the car over sometimes to remember where she was going. Strangely, I attributed most of this to my mom's personality and never really considered her ill. I now sympathize with her condition but at the same time am determined to overcome this iron deficiency so I could be awake to see my kids grow up.... and remember it!
So, as painful as it is, I will allow my family with little medical training (my husband was a volunteer paramedic in Mexico when he was a teenager) to inject me with iron (my bottom is already so bruised it hurts to sit) and I plan to continue taking iron until my levels are at least 20 (a level recommended for performance athletes).
Did I mention my iron deficiency began to hurt my marriage?
Just think.. I am asleep by 8 pm... yeah, I think Eloy started to get resentful/ feel neglected.
There's at least 10 more iron deficiency theories/ complaints I have, but I really should go to bed. Oh- and I'm taking a B-complex vitamin along with the injections and iron tablets now.
